DOMS responsibilities
by NOUSE4ANAME
NOUSE4ANAME'S Shacklet

Date: Sat Jan 29 20:00:20 2000
From: NOUSE4ANAME
Subject: DOMS responsibilities

(TIMS notes)These letters are/were written for an bdsm e group I was involved with once hated to throw em out hope ya get
some use out of them...S.S.C
TIM

Greetings,

I will attempt to answer these questions point by point in MY humble opinion.

Dominants:
Do you feel that you have limits?

Yes, I have VERY clearly defined limits from a moral (or immoral as it may be~WEG~) stand point.I have decided for Myself My
limits are a matter of personal choice and I have defined negotiable and non - negotiable limits in My relationships.


Do you feel it is a responsibility to explain your own limits to your submissive and why?

Again I must say yes of course IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY to convey My limits to My sub I like the BD/SM partner checklist by the castle realm group to help in that respect.It is a clear cut questionnaire with a list of BD/SM related topics and subjects i.e. abrasion,flogging ,breast torture etc. with likes/dislikes and a experience rating scale.If I choose NOT to tell My submissives My limits Wwho does? Communication open honest clear cut concise thats the key here an exchange of information an exchange of power from Top to bottom and vice versa


Do you feel that it is a submissives responsibility to explain her limits to you (not just tell you what they are)?

Yes, I believe it is her responsibility and the corner stone of all relationships VT and RT is open honest communication.I believe it also helps to know why. I have a needle phobia due to past life experiences........(personal reasons I am happy to discuss if anyone wants to know and many do already)I believe that it helps Me and her both to know where our collective heads are and where they have been.

When taking a sub v/t do you discuss limits and practice handling limits as you would in a r/t environment? Why?

Again yes,

Yes I do because I see VT as a stepping stone if I don't practice safe sane consensual play here how may others learn? I actually believe many in vt blunder by taking "supposed" knowledge learned here out into the world thinking many here have a clue of RT BD/SM when its obvious many dont....I have seen behavior in VT that would earn you a quick trip out of any play party on your ass... and many here accept it as "normal" this includes commenting on scenes in progress (loudly and disrespectfully) approaching and touching others collared submissives just to name a few..... unsafe non consensual play are all witnessed in the VT world> so I try and maintain an aire of reality in ALL I do so that O/others may learn here.

I am in hopes some will read this and appreciate it for what it is My own (KNOT SO HUMBLE )opinion I am not the be all end all of BD/SM/DS nor do I even laughingly want to be. I know what has and what continues to work for Me that's all..........

Respectfully:Master NOUSE4ANAME

TIM.............




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